Palatable.

Sometimes, being kind-hearted feels like an uphill battle. You give your time, energy, and care to others, only to be met with indifference or even exploitation. It’s a sentiment echoed in the timeless song by Wham. The bittersweet nature of giving and not receiving in return, a feeling many of us can relate to when we put our all on the line. Yet, there’s something deeply hopeful about the idea of giving—even if it doesn’t always work out. Today, I want to reflect on why good people sometimes finish last, and how embracing a mindset of prevention rather than cure can create healthier dynamics while preserving our own emotional well-being.

At the heart of every meaningful interaction is the hope of connection. Good people often see the glass as half-full, choosing to approach relationships with empathy and understanding. They’re the ones who listen intently, offer help without hesitation, and believe in the goodness of others, even when it’s hard to see. This optimism is a gift. It allows for deeper connections, reduces misunderstandings, and fosters an environment where people feel safe and valued. But it’s also a vulnerability. When you constantly pour yourself into others, you risk being drained, especially by those who see kindness not as a gift, but as an opportunity to take advantage.

It’s a frustrating paradox: the very traits that make good people so valuable can also leave them feeling undervalued. Why does this happen? Good people often prioritize others over themselves, putting others first even at the expense of their own needs. While this selflessness is admirable, it can lead to burnout and resentment if not reciprocated. They may also hesitate to set boundaries, fearing they might appear unkind or risk losing a connection. This allows others to overstep, sometimes unintentionally, leaving the good person feeling used. Moreover, society often values confidence and self-promotion over quiet acts of kindness. In group dynamics, the loudest voices may get attention, while the empathetic ones work quietly in the background, unnoticed. Finally, good people sometimes invest emotionally in the wrong individuals, much like in "Last Christmas," giving their hearts to those who don’t cherish them. It’s not a reflection of their worth but of the other person’s inability to value what they’ve been given.

What if, instead of constantly trying to fix broken relationships, we focused on preventing harm in the first place? Prevention starts with recognizing early warning signs. Pay attention to how people respond to your kindness. Do they appreciate it, or do they expect it? Do they reciprocate, or do they take it for granted? Setting healthy boundaries is equally important. Kindness doesn’t mean saying yes to everything. It’s okay to prioritize your needs and protect your emotional energy. Boundaries aren’t walls; they’re bridges to healthier connections. Additionally, it’s vital to invest your emotional energy wisely. Just as you wouldn’t give a precious gift to someone who doesn’t appreciate it, be mindful of who you give your time and care to. Reflect on past interactions and use those lessons to make better choices moving forward. 

Sometimes, prevention means cutting ties with people who drain rather than uplift. It’s not an act of cruelty but of self-preservation. Leech-like individuals—those who take without giving, who exploit kindness without gratitude—can leave you feeling empty. Letting go of these relationships creates space for more meaningful connections. It’s a hard lesson but an important one: you can’t pour from an empty cup. Protecting your emotional well-being isn’t selfish; it’s necessary to continue being the kind and generous person you are.

So, do good people truly finish last? Perhaps in the short term, it can feel that way. But kindness has a way of planting seeds that grow in unexpected ways. While the world may not always immediately reward your efforts, your actions create ripples that inspire others and build a better world. The key is balance: give freely, but not endlessly. Be kind, but not at the expense of your own happiness. And when you encounter someone who truly values your heart, give it—not cautiously, but wholeheartedly. Because at the end of the day, being a good person isn’t about finishing first or last. It’s about staying true to yourself, creating meaningful connections, and knowing when it’s time to walk away.