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"Love and make me feel Special." Respect me in Return then.




Most women often say," I just want someone to love me, to make me special, to make me the most important one in his life." No one seizes on these words and accuses women of being prima donnas or egomaniacs as Dr Eggerichs puts it in his book Love & Respect.

Yet when a man says he needs to be respected, he is often labelled, especially in our culture, as arrogant. In the days of courtship, the woman may think that her suitor is motivated to ask her out and more so to be his partner because of her love. After all, love is what is motivating her. That huge love and admiration in her for her man. But more than she realizes, it is her unique and intimate admiration that wins her man's heart. The old saying puts it: "Every man does what he does for admiration of one woman." In courtship times, when he asked her out, she became that woman and he took it meekly and out of his own heart to gain that courage to express his feelings. He felt deep feelings of love for her, but they came out of his being convinced that she respected him and admired him. She was striking a chord deep within him that literally drove his life then as his life today.

Men hold respect and honor as almost equal values. Being a man, in our arena as men, we have an honor code, and if we don't live by that honor code, we're in big trouble. We have learned from boyhood that there are certain things you just don't do, certain things you just don't say. A woman will talk to her man in private in the way that a man would never talk to him. He can't believe she can be so belligerent, so disrespectful.
The man will often look away, wanting to drop the argument and move on. He doesn't want to talk about it. Why? Because he feels engulfed and overpowered by his woman's dark countenance, negative emotions, and combative venomous words. All this annoys him and incites him the more. so he withdraws. To him, That is an Honourable thing to do!

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